I feel free.
Growing up, I never had the time or money to take dance class at a studio. And as the years flew by, my schedule continued to fill up with school related things that were, of course, free. But being involved in musical theatre, I always wanted to know more about dance. In fact whenever we did a show, I would sit in the wings and learn every step to every dance; a little "swing" in the making I suppose. I even had a friend attempt to teach me tap on a piece of plywood in her backyard once. But that's about as far as it went, until College. There I was forced to explore a world that seemed altogether strange and incoherent, also known as "Modern Dance." I was never one for the modern genre before then. But, after being given the chance to create my own work, and discovering how personal dance could be, my world expanded farther than I ever thought it would. Now I pray that every dance I do is more contemporary based.
After many years performing in various theatrical endeavors, I still say that nothing speaks more to my soul than company dance. I guess it is because I enjoy substance over flash. The passion. The flow. The compulsions and contradictions. The tendency to explore the rougher, darker parts of humanity. It's gritty, and it's real, and you can't be scared at all or you could literally fall flat on your face. And I suppose that is it, really. It allows me to be brave. Braver than I ever could be in real life. I experience everything and anything to its deepest degree, and then leave the moment behind, better for having had that chance to live a little more. I don't have to hold back, question myself, or deal with repercussions. I just have to dance. I can just be.
I feel free.
"To dance is to be yourself. Larger, more beautiful, more powerful. This is power on earth and it is yours for the taking." -Agnes DeMille